I wonder if this is common among adoptees? Does a desire to return our families of origin lurk beneath the surface of our consciousness, rising up periodically in ways beyond our control? I would love to hear from other adoptees on this subject. Have you experienced anything similar?
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
An Adoptee's Fantasy of Return
I grew up in a very loving adoptive family, yet throughout my childhood I fantasized about escaping from it. I would fall asleep at night thinking over my plans to run away. These plans were very vague; I thought little of how I would survive or what I would do after I set off ... but I knew in which direction I would head. It wasn't until many years later, as an adult, that the significance of that direction struck me. I was planning to head toward the hospital in which I was born, the place where the separation from my biological mother occurred. It was a fantasy of return.