There's no clinical or practical evidence to indicate that adoptees or birth parents try to disrupt or interfere with adoptions that include contact. To the contrary, many adoptive families grow stronger, and all of the people involved become more secure, when their relationships cease to be based on fear and fantasy. -- Adam Pertman, Adoption NationI've been wanting to write something that would incorporate this quote, but it stands pretty well on its own. So I'll just add that my own experience backs up his statement; our adoptive family did grow stronger as we formed a real relationship with Erica, our daughter's first mom. Prior to opening things up, she was a shadowy figure lurking on the edges of our life. Now, she is a real (and loved!) member of our extended family. That's definitely a change for the better. If you are an adoptive parent who hasn't already made this leap, please consider doing so. Can it be scary? Yes. But the typical fears that come up around open adoption are largely unfounded, and the potential benefits are great. Taking that leap may very well prove to be the best thing you've ever done.