Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Update: The State of My Reunion and Other Matters

I've been a bit quiet on the blog lately. There are a few reasons for this. One is that I've been focusing more deliberately on my off-line relationships, trying to be more available to my husband and children. The reunion with my birth father caused me to turn inward for a while. I remember the same thing happening all those years ago as I was reconnecting with my original mother. I went through a reflective and somewhat antisocial phase, but it passed. A similar thing happened this time around, and my family noticed that I was with them but not fully with them. Now I'm moving out of that phase and trying to be more actively present with them.

I've also been focusing more on my health, trying to establish some self-care habits, including exercise. As a result, I've replaced some of my internet and social networking time with walking. This is a good thing.

I've also discovered that as my original father becomes more of real person to me, and less of an abstract concept, I'm less willing to write about him in this public forum. He and I are continuing to interact, but I'm not moved to share every detail of those interactions or every discovery about who he is. In fact, I wrote a post called "Five Things I Have Learned About My Biological Father" (a follow-up to the the Five Things post I wrote about him back in March, before I was in contact with him), but instead of posting it here, I mailed it to him.

I will share that I am pleasantly surprised with how things are working out so far. And cautiously optimistic about the future. When I reached out, I was hoping for some information and possibly a face-to-face meeting. I didn't expect to find myself in the position of developing an ongoing relationship, but that seems to be how things are evolving.

I'm also very excited to be heading into a visit with my first mother. I'm currently out of town on a business trip and, if all goes according to schedule, I'll be arriving at my local airport a few minutes before she does tonight. We'll both be working for a few days, and then we are heading off on a mother-daughter road trip. Watch out Maine! Here we come!

We are planning to stop for dinner with my first father as we pass by his town. That should be interesting. I don't know how many baby-scoop era adoptees have had the opportunity to see both parents at the same time, but I'm guessing not many.

4 comments:

  1. WOW- all together? I remember after I found my natural father- I started to envision my natural mother, me and him- walking together through a park me in the middle all of us holding hands. In this thought- I was a child. It is something that still comes to me at times.
    Glad things are going well. I too am trying to spend more time with the people in my real life- and less time zoning out on the computer.

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  2. warriorprincessdiariesAugust 15, 2012 at 9:39 PM

    Oh my goodness, seeing them...together. Sigh. This just happened to me...for me. It was amazing. I plan to write about it a little so I'm not going to spill it all here. ; ) I hope it's nice experience for all of you.

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  3. Oh my! I'm so excited for you, yet nervous at the same time! I pray it all goes well. I also understand your becoming pretty busy! Family and kids always first!

    Thinking about you--- Ta Ta for now, until your next post! XOXO

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  4. It's soo good to hear from you! I had been wondering where you'd been :) So happy to hear that everything is going along smoothly!! What an amazing privilege to see both of them. I truly hope it is a wonderful time together!

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