I have been in reunion with my mother for 17 years and my father for a few months. I have learned that reunion is not the end of the search for self; it is part of a lifelong process. I will always be adopted. I will probably always be engaged in the process of making sense of what it means to be a member of more than one family.
But at least now I have some material to use. I know whose daughter I am: his and his, hers and hers. I am no longer thrown off balance by missing pieces.
I remember the profound loneliness I felt back before I had met any of the members of my biological family. I remember the confusion caused by the absence of knowledge. Reunion isn't always easy, but for me the time before reunion was worse. Much worse. I would not go back for anything.
|My mother and my daughter in Cape Cod: One of many reunion moments.|